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Quotes by

Larry David

I couldnt be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, because I can finally put an end to all those who questioned my motives for enlisting in the Army Reserve at the height of the Vietnam War. – Larry David

Religion doesnt play any part in my life in terms of how I live my life. But I dont think Ive ever gone through a day in my life without hearing someone say the word Jew or saying it myself. – Larry David

The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so its the best of both worlds. Theres a lot to be said for it. – Larry David

There are times when Im driving home after a days shooting, thinking to myself, That scene wouldve been so much better if I had written it out. – Larry David

If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny. – Larry David

I think were all good and bad, but goods not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny. – Larry David

You have to discover when youre inadequate to be funny and you dont know youre inadequate when youre a kid. – Larry David

Theres also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny. – Larry David

When youre not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom. – Larry David

Once I know people know who I am, it gives me a lot of licence and freedom to behave in ways I wouldnt normally. – Larry David

The lunch in a normal American restaurant is very problematic for me. I dont like to have hot food for lunch. – Larry David

The only change I can really see is that I dont have to shop for pants in stores anymore. – Larry David

I gave a funny speech at my wifes birthday party, and Im thinking, Hey, Ive still got it. – Larry David

Women love a self-confident bald man. – Larry David

Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy. – Larry David

Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious. – Larry David

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian. – Larry David

I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money – this is the guy who needs to laugh. – Larry David

Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on! – Larry David

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas. – Larry David