You sometimes see a woman who would have made a Joan of Arc in another century and climate, threshing herself to pieces over all the mean worry of housekeeping. – Rudyard Kipling
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. – Erma Bombeck
Nature abhors a vacuum. And so do I. – Anne Gibbons
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing. – Phyllis Diller, Phyllis Diller’s Housekeeping Hints, 1966
Housework is something you do that nobody notices until you don’t do it. – Author Unknown
Our house is clean enough to be healthy, and dirty enough to be happy. – Author Unknown
Don’t cook. Don’t clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum – “My God, the floor’s immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch.” – Joan Rivers
The Rose Bowl is the only bowl I’ve ever seen that I didn’t have to clean. – Erma Bombeck
I think housework is the reason most women go to the office. – Heloise Cruse
I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on. – Roseanne Barr
The trouble with living alone is that it’s always your turn to do the dishes. – Author Unknown
There was no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn’t get any worse. – Quentin Crisp, The Naked Civil Servant, 1968
[H]ousework, if it is done right, can kill you. – John Skow, about the message of Erma Bombeck’s early columns in the 1960s,
I am thankful for a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing because it means I have a home…. I am thankful for the piles of laundry and ironing because it means my loved ones are nearby. – Nancie J. Carmody
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. – Erma Bombeck
This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, “Honey, do this,” and “Honey, do that” around the house. – Jim Lemon
The best time for planning a book is while you’re doing the dishes. – Agatha Christie
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. – Author Unknown
There’s nothing to match curling up with a good book when there’s a repair job to be done around the house. – Joe Ryan
My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you? – Erma Bombeck
