I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like Im the only one moving. – Steven Wright
I want to get a tattoo of myself on my entire body, only two inches taller. – Steven Wright

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like Im the only one moving. – Steven Wright
I want to get a tattoo of myself on my entire body, only two inches taller. – Steven Wright
I had to stop driving my car for a while… the tires got dizzy. – Steven Wright
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldnt park anywhere near the place. – Steven Wright