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Quote by Jerry Seinfeld
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you dont have

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you dont have a top for it. – Jerry Seinfeld

Other quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome. – Jerry Seinfeld

Category:
Marriage
Author
Jerry Seinfeld
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Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. – Jerry Seinfeld

Category:
Men
Author
Jerry Seinfeld
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Its amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. – Jerry Seinfeld

Category:
amazing
Author
Jerry Seinfeld
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

There have been times when I felt suicidal and I would stop my head from going in that direction of negativity because I thought thered be something Id miss that was funny in the future. If theres a chance Im going to laugh tomorrow then want to live to experience that. – Dave Navarro

Category:
funny

Funny is only something that others know about you – you cant be funny by yourself. – Chris Rock

Category:
funny

And the funny thing is, Ive always been an optimist – its practically a congenital disorder with me. – Molly Ivins

Category:
funny

Theyre great girls. Theyre very funny, theyre very smart, theyre fun to be with. Theyre very lively, as I think people can tell. And you know, theyre very confident girls. – Laura Bush

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

The essential joy of being with horses is that it brings us in contact with the rare elements of grace, beauty, spirit, and fire. – Sharon Ralls Lemon

Category:
Horses

None of my characters are rich or famous, and the situations they find themselves in could happen to anyone. – Nicholas Sparks

Category:
famous

Nature breaks through the eyes of the cat. – Proverb

Category:
Nature

A return to first principles in a republic is sometimes caused by the simple virtues of one man. His good example has such an influence that the good men strive to imitate him, and the wicked are ashamed to lead a life so contrary to his example. – Niccolo Machiavelli

Category:
good