Quote by Jerry Seinfeld
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you dont have

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you dont have a top for it. – Jerry Seinfeld

Other quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

The first real thought that I had of something that I might do was to write for car magazines, because I always had a car thing. – Jerry Seinfeld

Category:
car
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Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. – Jerry Seinfeld

Category:
Men
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Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept Gods final word on where your lips end. – Jerry Seinfeld

Category:
God
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy is a form of service journalism. To be successful, I think it has to be a combination of a good story, it has to be funny, and it also needs to be packed with useful information. – Ted Allen

Category:
funny

People never ask people doing serious music, Do you ever think about doing funny music? – Al Yankovic

Category:
funny

You know whats funny? I dont ever feel the need to escape. I have a strong marriage. I like my life. You hear about these guys having midlife crises – I dont see that happening to me. – Harry Connick, Jr.

Category:
funny

Theres nothing wrong with being shallow as long as youre insightful about it. – Dennis Miller

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

Liking money like I like it, is nothing less than mysticism. Money is a glory. – Salvador Dali

Category:
Money

The diagnosis of homosexuality as a “disorder” is a contributing factor to the pathology of those homosexuals who do become mentally ill…. Nothing is more likely to make you sick than being constantly told that you are sick. – Ronald Gold, c.1975

Category:
Homosexuality

I wouldnt ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know, important – Dick Butkus

Think of the fierce energy concentrated in an acorn! You bury it in the ground, and it explodes into an oak! Bury a sheep, and nothing happens but decay. – George Bernard Shaw

Category:
Vegetarianism