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Quote by Joan Rivers
If God wanted us to bend over hed put diamonds on the floor. - Joa

If God wanted us to bend over hed put diamonds on the floor. – Joan Rivers

Other quotes by Joan Rivers

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made. – Joan Rivers

Category:
Happiness
Author
Joan Rivers
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Don’t cook. Don’t clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum – “My God, the floor’s immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch.” – Joan Rivers

Category:
Housework
Author
Joan Rivers
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

Who knew Rob Lowe was funny? On Parks and Rec, weve got some of the funniest comedy writers, some of the funniest comedians in the world working there. And if anything, we dont just effuse to one another and be like, Oh, Rob Lowes really funny, if he wasnt. – Chris Pratt

Category:
funny

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic. – Spike Milligan

Category:
funny

Im so unprofessional on set its not even funny. – Katharine McPhee

Category:
funny

There are so many funny women in the world, and there has been for so many years, so Ill be happy when people can just move on from that, and things can just be comedies and not female or male, and everyone gets an equal opportunity. – Kristen Wiig

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

The ultimate ground of faith and knowledge is confidence in God. – Charles Hodge

Category:
Faith

So heres the question: Without a change in leadership, why would the next four years be any different from the last four years? – Paul Ryan

Category:
Change

Many cats are the death of the mouse. – Kaspar Hauser

Category:
pet

Your chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself. – Robert Collier

Category:
Success