The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. – Phyllis Diller
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We spend the first twelve months of our childrens lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. – Phyllis Diller
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Its a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or Id be rotten to the core. – Phyllis Diller
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As by some might be saide of me: that here I have but gathered a nosegay of strange floures, and have put nothing of mine unto it, but the thred to binde them. Certes, I have given unto publike opinion, that these borrowed ornaments accompany me; but I meane not they should cover or hide me… – Michel de Montaigne, “Of Phisiognomy,” translated by John Florio; commonly moder
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