The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. – Phyllis Diller
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. – Phyllis Diller
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Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. – Phyllis Diller
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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. – Phyllis Diller
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Its funny how I use social media because I dont use it to promote my restaurants that much. I use it for social issues and I think thats what its for. I do a few things – I mess around with music a lot because thats a passion of mine. If something strikes me and I want to share it, I do. – Tom Colicchio
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