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Quote by Phyllis Diller
The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally go

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. – Phyllis Diller

Other quotes by Phyllis Diller

Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle – keep away from children. – Phyllis Diller

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work
Author
Phyllis Diller
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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. – Phyllis Diller

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Home
Author
Phyllis Diller
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

Its only I have seen enough of it and the funny thing is now, I know that Im skinny, because I know there are even smaller clothes in the store. I think Im big, when I was big, I never thought about it. – Karl Lagerfeld

Category:
funny

Its funny how the hippies and the punks tried to get rid of the conservatives, but they always seem to get the upper hand in the end. – Bjork

Category:
funny

Funny People is my favorite performance of myself to date. Even though its a comedy and there are serious moments, I really felt like Leo felt like a real person. It didnt feel like I was playing myself. Whether its a comedy or drama, I just try to make it as realistic as possible. – Jonah Hill

Category:
funny

Im smart and I can be really funny and interesting and I can go toe-to-toe with anybody in a conversation. – Megan Fox

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

Could I have but a line a century hence crediting a contribution to the advance of peace, I would yield every honor which has been accorded by war. – Douglas MacArthur

Category:
History

I was born upon thy bank, river,
My blood flows in thy stream,
And thou meanderest forever
At the bottom of my dream. – Henry David Thoreau

Category:
Rivers

Blood is a cleansing and sanctifying thing, and the nation that regards it as the final horror has lost its manhood… there are many things more horrible than bloodshed, and slavery is one of them! – Padraic Pearse

Category:
Blood

I know quite certainly that I myself have no special talent; curiosity, obsession and dogged endurance, combined with self-criticism have brought me to my ideas. – Albert Einstein

Category:
Endurance