We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion. – Fred Allen
The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion. – Fred Allen
The last time I saw him he was walking down lovers lane holding his own hand. – Fred Allen
My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense. – Fred Allen
President Bush offers the American people an optimistic vision and a clear choice in November. The President has provided steady leadership in remarkably changing times. He knows exactly where he wants to lead this country, and he has complete confidence in the American people. – Henry Bonilla