The food in such places is so tasteless because the members associate spices and garlic with just the sort of people theyre trying to keep out. – Calvin Trillin

I dont cook. I dont know anything about food. Ive never reviewed a restaurant. – Calvin Trillin

When it comes to Chinese food I have always operated under the policy that the less known about the preparation the better. A wise diner who is invited to visit the kitchen replies by saying, as politely as possible, that he has a pressing engagement elsewhere. – Calvin Trillin