Why dont you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini? – Robert Benchley
Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other. – Robert Benchley
A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. – Robert Benchley
When I was a kid I didnt feel like I fit in because – this is really silly and I probably shouldnt say it, but, I didnt think anything was funny. So I used to go home and literally cry to my mom and my step-dad at the time and I didnt think anything was funny. I couldnt laugh. – Courteney Cox