Quote by Demetri Martin
The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to re

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which theyre very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then theyre kind of hard to tell apart – especially if the human is kind of hairy. – Demetri Martin

Category:
car
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Stand-up is like a row boat: its fun and romantic when youre choosing to do it. But if you have no other choice than to be in a row boat its not as enjoyable thats survival. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Romantic
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I think it would be cool if you were writing a ransom note on your computer, if the paper clip popped up and said, Looks like youre writing a ransom note. Need help? You should use more forceful language, youll get more money. – Demetri Martin

Category:
cool
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

People forget how outcast They Might Be Giants can be. They have a reputation for writing really deft, funny, clever melodies, and they also make a lot of music for kids, which is terrific, but when you see them in concert, they can rock the house. – John Hodgman

Category:
funny

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets. – Mel Brooks

Category:
funny

I would love to play Funny Girl or Evita, but I idolize the women who have played those parts. I dont know if there needs to be another version of those shows. – Idina Menzel

Category:
funny

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger. – Billy Connolly

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

I did not imagine that the second half of my life would be spent on efforts to avert a mortal danger to humanity created by science. – Joseph Rotblat

Category:
Science

I am a real ham. I love an audience. I work better with an audience. I am dead, in fact, without one. – Lucille Ball

Category:
work

Fairness is not an attitude. Its a professional skill that must be developed and exercised. – Brit Hume

Category:
Attitude

There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one. – Jack Yelton

Category:
Gambling