Demetri Martin's Quote - For example, I was a White House intern the summer before I droppe

Quote by Demetri Martin

For example, I was a White House intern the summer before I droppe

For example, I was a White House intern the summer before I dropped out of law school. Everybody knew about it. Id come home and go to church and everybody would say, Oh, my God. Demetri, youre working at the White House. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

I think it would be cool if you were writing a ransom note on your computer, if the paper clip popped up and said, Looks like youre writing a ransom note. Need help? You should use more forceful language, youll get more money. – Demetri Martin

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The thing about glitter is, if you get it on you be prepared to have it on you forever because glitter is the herpes of craft supplies. – Demetri Martin

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If you cant tell a spoon from a ladle, then youre fat! – Demetri Martin

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For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that its time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward. – Erma Bombeck

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There are things you just cant do in life. You cant beat the phone company, you cant make a waiter see you until hes ready to see you, and you cant go home again. – Bill Bryson

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The most influential of all educational factors is the conversation in a childs home. – William Temple

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I live in, literally, the same home when I was swiping my first bank card and wondering if Id have to put back the Charmin. We still dont have a dishwasher. My mom has done all these gardens so now my house looks like the garden shack in the middle of Versailles. – Rachael Ray

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For me from a pretty young age up until about 21 years old hallucinogenics had a huge place in my life. – Jon Fishman

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A woman should be home with the children, building that home and making sure theres a secure family atmosphere. – Mel Gibson

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Philanthropy is the thing that I am really excited about, and having success means I can do more. – will.i.am

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To jealousy, nothing is more frightful than laughter. – Francoise Sagan

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