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Quotes by

Evan Esar

Hope is tomorrows veneer over todays disappointment. – Evan Esar

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasnt done it. – Evan Esar

Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures dont lie, but admits than under analysis some of them wont stand up either. – Evan Esar

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past. – Evan Esar

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week. – Evan Esar

Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures. – Evan Esar

Public speaking is the art of diluting a two-minute idea with a two-hour vocabulary. – Evan Esar

Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings. – Evan Esar

Family: A social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. – Evan Esar