When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. Its a whole different way of thinking. – Elayne Boosler
Wouldnt it be great if you could only get AIDS by giving money to television preachers? – Elayne Boosler
I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. – Elayne Boosler
Ive never been married, but I tell people Im divorced so they wont think somethings wrong with me. – Elayne Boosler