Were having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, were having a swan. You get more stuffing. – George Carlin
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. – George Carlin
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foots hands. – George Carlin
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. – George Carlin
While it may not be appropriate in every venue, and on every occasion, mockery is the guardian of reason, the enemy of pretension, and the mirror to folly. No belief, no passion, no commitment should be considered immune from the acerbic test of ridicule. – Dr. Idel Dreimer, www.lumpenbangenpiano.com
A just thinker will allow full swing to his scepticism. I dip my pen in the blackest ink, because I am not afraid of falling into my inkpot…. We are of different opinions at different hours, but we always may be said to be at heart on the side of truth. – Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Worship,” The Conduct of Life, 1860