In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number. – Steven Wright
There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators. – Steven Wright
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, Did you sleep good? I said No, I made a few mistakes. – Steven Wright
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. – Steven Wright
In the past few years, weve been doing amazing stuff with desserts. Pastry chefs have been using herbs and spices in their desserts. So vanilla cake doesnt have to be just vanilla, it can have a little thyme. Or you could have a custard with a little lavender in it, which is just amazing. – Ron Ben-Israel