Logo
Quote by Mitch Hedberg
This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... its dirty. - Mitch He

This shirt is dry clean only. Which means… its dirty. – Mitch Hedberg

Other quotes by Mitch Hedberg

I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, Youre gonna have to move, youre blocking a fire exit. As though if there was a fire, I wasnt gonna run. If youre flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. – Mitch Hedberg

Category:
Business
Author
Mitch Hedberg
Read Quote

I dont have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman whod be mad at me for saying that. – Mitch Hedberg

Category:
dating
Author
Mitch Hedberg
Read Quote

Im a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someones life. – Mitch Hedberg

Category:
Life
Author
Mitch Hedberg
Read Quote
Other Quotes from
funny
category

The fact that the Kardashians could be more popular than a show like Mad Men is disgusting. Its a super disgusting part of our culture, but I still find it funny to make a joke about it. – Jonah Hill

Category:
funny

Im half Jewish, Im half black, I look in-between. I dress funny. I play all these different styles of music on one record. Its like, What is he doing? – Lenny Kravitz

Category:
funny

This is funny because I just had a job over the summer for VH1, a project I did called Strange Frequency where I got to play a Goth rock band singer. – Charisma Carpenter

Category:
funny

People say funny things all the time during really serious moments in life. – Mark Ruffalo

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

I like to direct movies, but I dont like to goof around for eight years talking about it. – John Malkovich

Category:
movies

Most people wish to serve God — but only in an advisory capacity. – Author Unknown

Category:
God

The system is that there is no system. That doesnt mean we dont have process. Apple is a very disciplined company, and we have great processes. But thats not what its about. Process makes you more efficient. – Steve Jobs

Category:
great

Having once decided to achieve a certain task, achieve it at all costs of tedium and distaste. The gain in self-confidence of having accomplished a tiresome labor is immense. – Arnold Bennett

Category:
Goals