There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who have several thousand extra dollars apiece. – Dave Barry
I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford. – Dave Barry
The problem with winter sports is that – follow me closely here – they generally take place in winter. – Dave Barry
I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War. – Dave Barry
I am convinced that the world is not a mere bog in which men and women trample themselves and die. Something magnificent is taking place here amidst the cruelties and tragedies, and the supreme challenge to intelligence is that of making the noblest and best in our curious heritage prevail. – Charles Austin Beard