I named my dog Stay so I can say, “Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay.” – Steven Wright
I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window. – Steven Wright

I named my dog Stay so I can say, “Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay.” – Steven Wright
I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window. – Steven Wright
In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number. – Steven Wright
I went to a restaurant that serves “breakfast anytime.” So I ordered French toast during the Renaissance. – Steven Wright