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Quote by Steven Wright
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, Did you sleep

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, Did you sleep good? I said No, I made a few mistakes. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. – Steven Wright

Category:
legal
Author
Steven Wright
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I went to a restaurant that serves breakfast at any time. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. – Steven Wright

Category:
Time
Author
Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
good
category

We ought to do good to others as simply as a horse runs, or a bee makes honey, or a vine bears grapes season after season without thinking of the grapes it has borne. – Marcus Aurelius

Category:
good

If it looks good, youll see it. If it sounds good, youll hear it. If its marketed right, youll buy it. But… If its real… youll feel it. – Kid Rock

Category:
good

Music is love, love is music, music is life, and I love my life. Thank you and good night. – A. J. McLean

Category:
good

No one would remember the Good Samaritan if hed only had good intentions he had money as well. – Margaret Thatcher

Category:
good

Random Quotes

Housework is something you do that nobody notices until you don’t do it. – Author Unknown

Category:
Housework

Call your opinions your creed, and you will change them every week. Make your creed simply and broadly out of the revelation of God, and you will keep it to the end. – Phillips Brooks

Category:
Opinion

I believe that when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade — and then try to find someone whose life is giving them vodka, and have a party. – Ron White

Category:
Alcohol

I hope people like me and appreciate me the way I am. – Steve Yzerman

Category:
Hope