By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant. – Phyllis Diller
My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual. – Phyllis Diller
We spend the first twelve months of our childrens lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. – Phyllis Diller
Theres so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto. – Phyllis Diller
The reason that war is such a fascinating subject for writers is because its a revealer. Put a bunch of people in an adrenaline-fuelled, life-or-death situation and their fundamental behaviours are exposed, the scrim is taken away and the motivations behind each personality come out to play. – Sloane Crosley