Quote by Phyllis Diller
Housework cant kill you, but why take a chance? - Phyllis Diller

Housework cant kill you, but why take a chance? – Phyllis Diller

Other quotes by Phyllis Diller

Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed. – Phyllis Diller

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Other Quotes from
funny
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I wouldnt totally rule out doing Letterman or the Tonight Show if I had a set that I just happened to write that I thought was funny but was still appropriate for network censors. But Im not going to go out of my way. – Joe Rogan

Category:
funny

I show them the funny part, the silly part, the laughing part, the crazy part and then the really deep, deep part where Im talking from my heart to these people. Because Ive been through everything theyve been through. – Richard Simmons

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funny

If God wanted us to bend over hed put diamonds on the floor. – Joan Rivers

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funny

Its a real primal thing, watching someone get hurt. Its funny and accessible. – Johnny Knoxville

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funny

Random Quotes

There are only two or three human stories, and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely as if they had never happened before. – Willa Cather

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Storytelling

Be thankful for what you have youll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you dont have, you will never, ever have enough. – Oprah Winfrey

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thankful

Stupidity is infinitely more fascinating that intelligence. Intelligence has its limits while stupidity has none. – Claude Chabrol

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Intelligence

Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them. – Jean Kerr

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best