Quote by Phyllis Diller
Housework cant kill you, but why take a chance? - Phyllis Diller

Housework cant kill you, but why take a chance? – Phyllis Diller

Other quotes by Phyllis Diller

We spend the first twelve months of our childrens lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. – Phyllis Diller

Category:
teacher
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. – Phyllis Diller

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Other Quotes from
funny
category

And theres a visceral fun in watching Team America and making it, like taking a puppet and throwing it against the wall. Because its not CG, theres something funny about it. – Matt Stone

Category:
funny

If you work at comedy too laboriously, you can kill whats funny in the joke. – Richard Russo

Category:
funny

Its a funny old world. – Margaret Thatcher

Category:
funny

I dont think of myself as a comedian, but as an artist, a scientist and chemist who just happens to be funny. I started doing stand-up to add another level to my game. I feel that Im a young rookie with a veterans skill. – Marlon Wayans

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

It is useless to hold a person to anything he says while he is in love, drunk, or running for office. – Shirley MacLaine

Category:
Promises

The brain is a commodity used to fertilize ideas. – Elbert Hubbard

Category:
Ideas

There are trivial truths and the great truths. The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false. The opposite of a great truth is also true. – Niels Bohr

Category:
great

That shes the worst driver in the history of drivers. If I know shes going somewhere, I stay home. When asked what time has taught him about Jennifer Aniston – Matthew Perry

Category:
Driving