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Quote by Emo Philips
How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand. - Emo

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand. – Emo Philips

Other quotes by Emo Philips

Women: You cant live with them, and you cant get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something. – Emo Philips

Category:
Women
Author
Emo Philips
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I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men dont seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper. – Emo Philips

Category:
Men
Author
Emo Philips
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

Im so unprofessional on set its not even funny. – Katharine McPhee

Category:
funny

I dont really have a type of guy I like. Its just like nice guys, cute boys I mean, ones that are funny. – Emma Roberts

Category:
funny

Do you want me to apologize after every joke? If it doesnt offend somebody its probably not a joke. Its probably an observation thats not funny. Its gotta offend somebody somewhere. – Jeff Ross

Category:
funny

They did that little thing on South Park, and they mentioned my name and had a character of me judging a Halloween contest. It was really funny.That made me the coolest aunt on earth. – Tina Yothers

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

Theres a way to do better… find it. – Thomas Alva Edison

Category:
Excellence

I do consider myself part of black history. – Mary J. Blige

Category:
History

You never know God is all you need until God is all you have. – Rick Warren

Category:
God

Its something we, guys, have all done. Made tapes for girls, trying to impress them, to meet them on a shared plane of aesthetics. Read them someone elses poetry because they do poetry better than you could do it, because youre too awkward to do it. – John Cusack

Category:
Poetry