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Quote by Steven Wright
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I h

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and Im gone. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators. – Steven Wright

Category:
power
Author
Steven Wright
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I went to a restaurant that serves breakfast at any time. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. – Steven Wright

Category:
Time
Author
Steven Wright
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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? – Steven Wright

Category:
Food
Author
Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
car
category

I will argue that in the literal sense the programmed computer understands what the car and the adding machine understand, namely, exactly nothing. – John Searle

Category:
car

To say that I am organized is an understatement, but my car tells a different story. – Emily Procter

Category:
car

Being an actress is similar to trying to fit in with the popular kids in high school. Youre expected to drive the right car, wear the right clothes and say the right things. – Lauren Ambrose

Category:
car

A car for every purse and purpose. – Alfred P. Sloan

Category:
car

Random Quotes

There is, incidentally, no way of talking about cats that enables one to come off as a sane person. – Dan Greenberg

Category:
Cats

I think that everybody in the world, whatever colour or creed, has a jerk like JR in his or her family somewhere. Whether it is a father, uncle, cousin or brother, everybody can identify with JR and that certainly had something to do with the success of Dallas. – Larry Hagman

Category:
Success

If I were to try to read, much less answer, all the attacks made on me, this shop might as well be closed for any other business. – Abraham Lincoln

Category:
Business

At some future period, not very distant as measured by centuries, the civilized races of man will almost certainly exterminate, and replace the savage races throughout the world. – Charles Darwin

Category:
Future