Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time. – Steven Wright
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. – Steven Wright

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time. – Steven Wright
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. – Steven Wright
I went to a cafe that advertised breakfast anytime, so I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. – Steven Wright
In America everybody is of opinion that he has no social superiors, since all men are equal, but he does not admit that he has no social inferiors, for, from the time of Jefferson onward, the doctrine that all men are equal applies only upwards, not downwards. – Bertrand Russell, Unpopular Essays, 1950