My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. – Jay London
I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger. – Jay London
It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes. – Jay London
My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality. – Jay London
If you think aficionados of a living Constitution want to bring you flexibility, think again. You think the death penalty is a good idea? Persuade your fellow citizens to adopt it. You want a right to abortion? Persuade your fellow citizens and enact it. Thats flexibility. – Antonin Scalia