Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that a child cannot do much harm one way or another. – Robert Benchley
In America there are two classes of travel — first class, and with children. – Robert Benchley
One of the chief duties of the fan is to engage in arguments with the man behind him. This department of the game has been allowed to run down fearfully. – Robert Benchley
Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about – Robert Benchley