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Football

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. – Erma Bombeck

Baseball is what we were. Football is what we have become. – Mary McGrory

I do not like football, which I think of as a game in which two tractors approach each other from opposite directions and collide. Besides, I have contempt for a game in which players have to wear so much equipment. Men play basketball in their underwear, which seems just right to me. – Anna Quindlen, Living Out Loud, 1988

He was the only man I ever saw who ran his own interference. – Steve Owen, about Bronko Nagurski

October is not only a beautiful month but marks the precious yet fleeting overlap of hockey, baseball, basketball, and football. – Jason Love

When somebody tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football. – Author Unknown

Life was a damned muddle — a football game with everyone offside and the referee gotten rid of — everyone claiming the referee would have been on his side. – F. Scott Fitzgerald

Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football. – Fran Lebowitz

Speed is not your fastest, but your slowest man. No back can run faster than his interference. – Jock Sutherland

When it comes to football, God is prejudiced — toward big, fast kids. – Chuck Mills

Australian Rules football might best be described as a game devised for padded cells, played in the open air. – Jim Murray

American football makes rugby look like a Tupperware party. – Sue Lawley, 1985