To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent. – Dave Barry
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. – Dave Barry

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent. – Dave Barry
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. – Dave Barry
Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet. – Dave Barry
The taxpayers cannot be relied upon to support performing arts such as opera. As a taxpayer, I am forced to admit that I would rather undergo a vasectomy via Weed Whacker than attend an opera. – Dave Barry