The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write themselves. – David Letterman
Theres only one requirement of any of us, and that is to be courageous. Because courage, as you might know, defines all other human behavior. And, I believe – because Ive done a little of this myself – pretending to be courageous is just as good as the real thing. – David Letterman
We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has sent a letter of apology to the Chinese. And, hes also given them a gift certificate for future nuclear secrets. – David Letterman
Theres no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting. – David Letterman
I am sure that in Canada the people appreciate this principle, and the general intelligence which prevails over that country is such that I am sure there is no danger of a reactionary policy ever finding a response in the hearts of any considerable number of our people. – Alexander Mackenzie