Today is Valentines Day – or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day! – Jay Leno
Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced theyre getting back together. You know what that means? Theres still hope for Ike and Tina Turner. – Jay Leno
For the first time in history, sex is more dangerous than the cigarette afterward. – Jay Leno
Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution. – Jay Leno
I have a great job writing for The Office, but, really, all television writers do is dream of one day writing movies. Ill put it this way: At the Oscars the most famous person in the room is, like, Angelina Jolie. At the Emmys the huge exciting celebrity is Bethenny Frankel. You get what I mean. – Mindy Kaling