The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers. – Dave Barry
As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula. – Dave Barry
Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. – Dave Barry
A Mission Statement is a dense slab of words that a large organization produces when it needs to establish that its workers are not just sitting around downloading Internet porn. – Dave Barry
Id like to look like Madonna when Im her age. I also look at athletes and love their bodies. Ive always wanted to be muscly, not skinny. A lot of women yo-yo around, but Im always aware if Im getting a bit out of shape. I never look at the scales but I can just tell. It goes on my tum and bum. – Ellie Goulding