Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet. – Dave Barry
Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro. – Dave Barry
In college, Yuppies major in business administration. If to meet certain requirements they have to take a liberal arts course, they take Business Poetry. – Dave Barry
The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. – Dave Barry
The limitation of riots, moral questions aside, is that they cannot win and their participants know it. Hence, rioting is not revolutionary but reactionary because it invites defeat. It involves an emotional catharsis, but it must be followed by a sense of futility. – Martin Luther King, Jr.