Im thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. – Paula Poundstone
The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer. – Paula Poundstone
Im thankful for Sarah Palins vice presidential bid, which taught us that Alaska is not in a box off the coast of California. – Paula Poundstone
My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, Mom, they werent trying to teach you how to swim. – Paula Poundstone