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Quote by Paula Poundstone
Im thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhe

Im thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. – Paula Poundstone

Other quotes by Paula Poundstone

I have a very silly sense of humor. Ive never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
Humor
Author
Paula Poundstone
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The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, its just sort of a tired feeling. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
Death
Author
Paula Poundstone
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My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, Mom, they werent trying to teach you how to swim. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
mom
Author
Paula Poundstone
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. Theres no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny, and either it works or youre finished. Its impossible to predict anything. – Colin Quinn

Category:
funny

I like funny guys and those, for some reason, tend to be nerdy guys. – Megan Fox

Category:
funny

I have funny bones. If theres ever any kind of tension, Ill always be the one to try and be funny to loosen things up. – Matt LeBlanc

Category:
funny

I was not particularly bright, I wasnt very athletic, I was a little too tall, odd, funny looking, I was just really weird as a kid. – Uma Thurman

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

When we are not sure, we are alive. – Graham Greene

Category:
Certainty

I was actually the one who decided to move to LA. Mom and I were driving on Sunset Boulevard during one of our trips back to see her family, and I said, Can we just stay? So we did. – Lily Collins

Category:
mom

No city should be too large for a man to walk out of in a morning. – Cyril Connolly

Category:
Cities

It’s easier to ask forgiveness than it is to get permission. – Grace Hopper

Category:
Forgiveness