I tend to show everything I do to my family, to check they wont be offended. – David Sedaris
I love things made out of animals. Its just so funny to think of someone saying, I need a letter opener. I guess Ill have to kill a deer. – David Sedaris
What other people call dark and despairing, I call funny. – David Sedaris
After a few months in my parents basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations. – David Sedaris