Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. Thats how rich I want to be. – Rita Rudner
I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctors office was full of portraits by Picasso. – Rita Rudner
Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie. – Rita Rudner
Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside. – Rita Rudner
Ultimately, literature is nothing but carpentry…. Both are very hard work. Writing something is almost as hard as making a table. With both you are working with reality, a material just as hard as wood. Both are full of tricks and techniques. Basically very little magic and a lot of hard work… – Gabriel Garcia Marquez, interview, The Paris Review, 1981