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Quote by Steven Wright
I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing Happy Birthday. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, What for? I said, Im going to buy some sugar. – Steven Wright

Category:
Money
Author
Steven Wright
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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? – Steven Wright

Category:
Food
Author
Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

And I was very shy as a kid if you sang me Happy Birthday, I would cry. Quite shy. So the idea of being an actor, much less a model, was just out of this world. – Cody Horn

Category:
Birthday

It is ironic that the one thing that all religions recognize as separating us from our creator, our very self-consciousness, is also the one thing that divides us from our fellow creatures. It was a bitter birthday present from evolution. – Annie Dillard

Category:
Birthday

I worked at an ice cream parlor called Chadwicks. We wore old-timey outfits and had to bang a drum, play a kazoo, and sing Happy Birthday to people while giving them free birthday sundaes. Lots of ice cream scooping and $1 tips. – Amy Poehler

Category:
Birthday

They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. – Author Unknown

Category:
Birthday

Random Quotes

No human being believes that any other human being has a right to be in bed when he himself is up. – Robert Lynd

Category:
Morning

The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will. – Vince Lombardi

Category:
Knowledge

Beauty, sweet love, is like the morning dew, Whose short refresh upon tender green, Cheers for a time, but till the sun doth show And straight is gone, as it had never been. – Samuel Daniel

Category:
Beauty

I sort of try to write everything for me. Im a huge sports fan but have no interest in minutiae. I dont remember who won Super Bowls five years ago or listen to sports talk radio. Im trying to make sure the jokes are self-contained so theyre accessible to everyone. – Norm MacDonald

Category:
Sports