Quote by Demetri Martin
People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argu

People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which theyre very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then theyre kind of hard to tell apart – especially if the human is kind of hairy. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

The thing about glitter is, if you get it on you be prepared to have it on you forever because glitter is the herpes of craft supplies. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Scrapbooking
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If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Time
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Other Quotes from
car
category

Consider what kind of car you get. Buy cars and other products that have the least impact environmentally. – Al Gore

Category:
car

The body is like a car: the older you become the more care you have to take care of it – and you dont leave a Ferrari out in the sun. – Joan Collins

Category:
car

Racing a thoroughbred grand prix car in front of a home crowd will be a surreal and mighty experience. – Nigel Mansell

Category:
car

I think were getting to the point where everyones getting fat and everyones getting allergic, or claims to be allergic to something and people cant walk from their front door to their car without a bottle of water in their hand because they have to hydrate every three and half steps. – Adam Carolla

Category:
car

Random Quotes

When I look at a lot of older stuff that Ive written, I think one sign of amateur humor writing is when you see people trying too hard. – David Sedaris

Category:
Humor

He cast off his friends as a huntsman his pack, for he knew when he pleased he could whistle them back. – Oliver Goldsmith

Category:
Recognition

Nature uses only the longest threads to weave her patterns, so that each small piece of her fabric reveals the organization of the entire tapestry. – Richard P. Feynman

Category:
Nature

No one can confidently say that he will still be living tomorrow. – Euripides

Category:
Death