Quote by Demetri Martin
People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argu

People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which theyre very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then theyre kind of hard to tell apart – especially if the human is kind of hairy. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

I like women, but you cant always trust them. Some of them are big liars, like this one woman I met who had a dog. I asked her her dogs name and then I asked, Does he bite? and she said, No. And I said, So how does he eat? Liar! – Demetri Martin

Category:
Trust
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Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Time
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Other Quotes from
car
category

I always keep a ball in the car. You never know. – Hakeem Olajuwon

Category:
car

A car is useless in New York, essential everywhere else. The same with good manners. – Mignon McLaughlin

Category:
car

I love singin in the car, it just makes me feel good. – Scotty McCreery

Category:
car

The courts cannot garnish a fathers salary, nor freeze his account, nor seize his property on behalf of his children, in our society. Apparently this is because a kid is not a car or a couch or a boat. – June Jordan

Category:
car

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If we had 3 million exhibitionists and only one voyeur, nobody could make any money. – Albert Brooks

Category:
Money

My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive. – Rodney Dangerfield

Category:
car

In my books, I never portray violence as a reasonable solution to a problem. If the lead characters in the story are driven to it, its at the extreme end of their experience. – Dean Koontz

Category:
Experience

Some ideas you have to chew on, then roll them around a lot, play with them before you can turn them into funky science fiction. – Rudy Rucker

Category:
Science