Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. – Johnny Carson
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself. – Johnny Carson

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. – Johnny Carson
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself. – Johnny Carson
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. – Johnny Carson
If it werent for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, wed still be eating frozen radio dinners. – Johnny Carson