My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. – Erma Bombeck
What were really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving? – Erma Bombeck
Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub. – Erma Bombeck
Marriage has no guarantees. If thats what youre looking for, go live with a car battery. – Erma Bombeck
Every summer my husband and I pack our suitcases, load our kids into the car, and drive from tense, crowded New York City to my familys cottage in Maine. Its on an island, with stretches of sea and sandy beaches, rocky coasts, and pine trees. We barbecue, swim, lie around, and try to do nothing. – Hope Davis