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Quote by Steven Wright
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in t

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing Happy Birthday. – Steven Wright

Category:
Birthday
Author
Steven Wright
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Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. – Steven Wright

Category:
Poker
Author
Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
Time
category

Waste is worse than loss. The time is coming when every person who lays claim to ability will keep the question of waste before him constantly. The scope of thrift is limitless. – Thomas A. Edison

Category:
Time

The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time. – Jack London

Category:
Time

Its the same each time with progress. First they ignore you, then they say youre mad, then dangerous, then theres a pause and then you cant find anyone who disagrees with you. – Tony Benn

Category:
Time

What then is time? If no one asks me, I know what it is. If I wish to explain it to him who asks, I do not know. – Saint Augustine

Category:
Time

Random Quotes

The sad thing is, when it comes to diet, is that even when well-intentioned Feds try to do right by us, they fail. Either theyre outvoted by puppets of agribusiness, or they are puppets of agribusiness. – Mark Bittman

Category:
diet

I perceive that God is no respecter of persons. Acts 10:34 – Bible

Category:
Class

Dont necessarily avoid sharp edges. Occasionally they are necessary to leadership. – Donald Rumsfeld

Category:
Leadership

Travelers repose and dream among my leaves. – William Blake

Category:
Travel