I don’t have to look up my family tree, because I know that I’m the sap. – Fred Allen
Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. Theyre afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs. – Fred Allen

I don’t have to look up my family tree, because I know that I’m the sap. – Fred Allen
Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. Theyre afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs. – Fred Allen
I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there. – Fred Allen
Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted. – Fred Allen