I dont have a bank account because I dont know my mothers maiden name. – Paula Poundstone
I have a very silly sense of humor. Ive never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe. – Paula Poundstone
My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, Mom, they werent trying to teach you how to swim. – Paula Poundstone
I dont need a holiday or a feast to feel grateful for my children, the sun, the moon, the roof over my head, music, and laughter, but I like to take this time to take the path of thanks less traveled. – Paula Poundstone