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Quote by Paula Poundstone
I dont have a bank account because I dont know my mothers maiden n

I dont have a bank account because I dont know my mothers maiden name. – Paula Poundstone

Other quotes by Paula Poundstone

I used to watch The Waltons and sob because my family was nothing like that. We had a cruel sense of humor in my family. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
Humor
Author
Paula Poundstone
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Im thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
funny
Author
Paula Poundstone
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I have a very silly sense of humor. Ive never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
Humor
Author
Paula Poundstone
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

Its funny, when bands or younger musicians ask me: So, what does it take to make it? Well, first explain to me what you mean by making it: Do you want to be a rock star or do you want music to be your livelihood? – Eddie Van Halen

Category:
funny

Comedy clubs can be brutal. Those people are for real, and if you arent funny, they arent laughing. They dont care who you are. – Marlon Wayans

Category:
funny

Billy is a funny, cheeky, lovely boy and I love being with him. Parenthood is terrifying though. I can barely walk past a building without panicking that its going to collapse on his head. – Rufus Sewell

Category:
funny

Twitter, to me, works if youre funny. Twitter doesnt work as a promotional tool unless you do it very, very, very occasionally. – Albert Brooks

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

A mission is a place where you ask nonbelievers to come and find faith and hope and feel love. – Robert H. Schuller

Category:
Faith

A place for everything, everything in its place. – Benjamin Franklin

Category:
inspirational

I want no epitaphs of profound history and all that type of thing. I contributed. I would hope they would say that, and I would hope somebody liked me. – Brian Clough

Category:
History

To this day, some of my closest friends say, Gaga, you know, everythings great. Youre a singer your dreams have come true. But, still, when certain things are said to you over and over again as youre growing up, it stays with you and you wonder if theyre true. – Lady Gaga

Category:
Dreams