And of course I didnt make any money from stand up for years, so I had temp jobs. That was the way I made money. – Demetri Martin
I didnt do improv in college, I never performed, I didnt do theater either. I was in student government, I was a history major. – Demetri Martin
I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I am good at everything. – Demetri Martin
I think it would be cool if you were writing a ransom note on your computer, if the paper clip popped up and said, Looks like youre writing a ransom note. Need help? You should use more forceful language, youll get more money. – Demetri Martin