Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. – Mark Twain
A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to us than the 99 which we had to work for, and the money won at Faro or in the stock market snuggles into our hearts in the same way. – Mark Twain
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. – Mark Twain
Obscurity and competence: That is the life that is worth living. – Mark Twain
Thank God for tea! What would the world do without tea? how did it exist? I am glad I was not born before tea. I can drink any quantity when I have not tasted wine; otherwise I am haunted by blue-devils by day, and dragons by night. – Sydney Smith, quoted in A Memoir of the Reverend Sydney Smith: Volume I by his d