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Quote by Demetri Martin
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wr

I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said Happy Birthday on it. I didnt want to waste it so I just wrote Jesus on it. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

And my only rule being if when I wake in the morning Im looking forward to the things that I have to do that day, then Im on the right track. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Morning
Author
Demetri Martin
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The comedians I liked were Bill Cosby and Steven Wright, like just always as a comedic actor. I always liked Gary Larson, whos really funny for a cartoonist, obviously. – Demetri Martin

Category:
funny
Author
Demetri Martin
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The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly. – Demetri Martin

Category:
funny
Author
Demetri Martin
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Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

The first fact about the celebration of birthdays is that it is a good way of affirming defiantly, and even flamboyantly, that it is a good thing to be alive. – G.K. Chesterton, “Our Birthday,” 1935

Category:
Birthday

We have to be able to grow up. Our wrinkles are our medals of the passage of life. They are what we have been through and who we want to be. – Lauren Hutton

Category:
Birthday

I love photography. My boyfriends got a great camera, which I bought for his birthday. – Sarah Sutton

Category:
Birthday

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm. – Bruce Barton

Category:
Birthday

Random Quotes

You cannot endow even the best machine with initiative; the jolliest steam-roller will not plant flowers. – Walter Lippmann

Category:
Technology

If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile. – Lynda Barry

Category:
Time

I have learned the art of filling in your lines with your visuals and your movies and your imagination. – Daphne Zuniga

Category:
Imagination

Marriage is like a formality for me. – David Copperfield

Category:
Marriage