Quote by Demetri Martin
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wr

I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said Happy Birthday on it. I didnt want to waste it so I just wrote Jesus on it. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

I didnt do improv in college, I never performed, I didnt do theater either. I was in student government, I was a history major. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Government
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Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away. – Demetri Martin

Category:
funny
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But what I was going to say was, I just figured Im going to go boldly in the direction of my dreams, say it as Thoreau would say, and just see where it takes me. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Dreams
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Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

Just hit my 75th birthday, Im feeling great! – Colin Powell

Category:
Birthday

There is still no cure for the common birthday. – John Glenn

Category:
Birthday

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. – Erma Bombeck

Category:
Birthday

New Years Day is every mans birthday. – Charles Lamb

Category:
Birthday

Random Quotes

Every evening I turn my worries over to God. He’s going to be up all night anyway. – Mary C. Crowley

Category:
Cancer Support

We may smile at these matters, but they are melancholy illustrations. – Joseph Howe

Category:
smile

Why chase a hopeless dream? I dunno, maybe for the dream, maybe for the chase, maybe to meet another hopeless dreamer. – Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com

Category:
Wise Words

What a stupid attitude we have in this country to personal stories. – Amanda Burton

Category:
Attitude