Demetri Martin's Quote - I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wr

Quote by Demetri Martin

I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wr

I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said Happy Birthday on it. I didnt want to waste it so I just wrote Jesus on it. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away. – Demetri Martin

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But I found that disappointing people is a good thing, because disapproval is freedom. – Demetri Martin

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I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming. – Demetri Martin

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Other Quotes from

Birthday

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I crashed my boyfriends birthday when I was 12 years old. He didnt invite me and so I showed up. – Isla Fisher

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The American flag is an enduring symbol of liberty, democracy, and justice. It is fitting that the House act to protect it as we approach our nations birthday, and as our men and women in uniform rally behind it in Iraqs battlefields. – Joe Barton

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I hate birthdays. – Zane Grey

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The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. – Lucille Ball

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Random Quotes

If we treated everyone we meet with the same affection we bestow upon our favorite cat, they, too, would purr. – Martin Buxbaum

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Its easy to underestimate the real cost of home ownership. – Suze Orman

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Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. – Nancy Friday

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Drink—wine dissipates sorrow! – Jacques-Henri Bernardin de Saint-Pierre (1737–1814), “Of the Sentiments of

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