Whats so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. Its like a shock and aw shucks campaign. – Dennis Miller
Im a comedian, for Gods sake. Viewers shouldnt trust me. And you know what? Theyre hip enough to know they shouldnt trust me. Im just doing stand-up comedy. – Dennis Miller
Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is just a piece of paper. Well, so is money, and whats more life-affirming than cold, hard cash? – Dennis Miller
Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. – Dennis Miller
Touring is tough. Youre almost in a haze because you dont really know where you are half the time: Youre in a hotel room one moment, and the next thing you know, youre onstage performing for 60,000 people, then youre back on an airplane. Its very hectic and I couldnt do it without my family. – Vanessa Hudgens