Theres no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting. – David Letterman
Dont forget its daylight savings time. You spring forward, then you fall back. Its like Robert Downey Jr. getting out of bed. – David Letterman
We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has sent a letter of apology to the Chinese. And, hes also given them a gift certificate for future nuclear secrets. – David Letterman
I cannot sing, dance or act what else would I be but a talk show host. – David Letterman