There is a sort of charm in ugliness, if the person has some redeeming qualities and is only ugly enough. – Josh Billings
When a man gets talking about himself, he seldom fails to be eloquent and often reaches the sublime. – Josh Billings
If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time. – Josh Billings
There are people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen to them. – Josh Billings
You say grace before meals. All right. But I say grace before the concert and the opera, and grace before the play and pantomime, and grace before I open a book, and grace before sketching, painting, swimming, fencing, boxing, walking, playing, dancing and grace before I dip the pen in the ink. – G.K. Chesterton