We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations – were doing everything we can to keep our marriage together. – Rodney Dangerfield
Men who do things without being told draw the most wages. – Rodney Dangerfield
With my wife I dont get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to the best woman a man ever had. The waiter joined me. – Rodney Dangerfield
I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender. – Rodney Dangerfield