Quote by Groucho Marx
I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt. - Grouch

I remember the first time I had sex – I kept the receipt. – Groucho Marx

Other quotes by Groucho Marx

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, youve got it made. – Groucho Marx

Category:
Life
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Im not feeling very well – I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. – Groucho Marx

Category:
Medical
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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies. – Groucho Marx

Category:
Art
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Other Quotes from
Time
category

I can only note that the past is beautiful because one never realises an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we dont have complete emotions about the present, only about the past. – Virginia Woolf

Category:
Time

Anyone who says theyre not afraid at the time of a hurricane is either a fool or a liar, or a little bit of both. – Anderson Cooper

Category:
Time

Forever is a long bargain. – Proverb

Category:
Time

Every time I write something, I think, this is the most offensive thing I will ever write. But no. I always surprise myself. – Chuck Palahniuk

Category:
Time

Random Quotes

Youre never guaranteed about next year. People ask what you think of next season, you have to seize the opportunities when theyre in front of you. – Brett Favre

And I think that being able to make people laugh and write a book thats funny makes the information go down a lot easier and it makes it a lot more fun to read, easier to understand, and often stronger. So theres all kinds of advantages to it. – Al Franken

Category:
funny

The key to sitcom success is miserable people. If you see a happy couple, its just gone, like when Sam and Diane got together on Cheers. – Matthew Perry

Category:
Success

In my solitude I have pondered much on the incomprehensible subjects of space, eternity, life and death. – Alfred Russel Wallace

Category:
Death